Picking Up The Pieces
by samanthabravo
Summary: Her missing half...


**Picking Up The Pieces**

**_**This story takes place awhile after the awful "Sweet Life" novella series. There will be my own twists to that oh-so-dubious canon Francine Pascal introduced in "Sweet Valley Confidential". It starts off really angsty so be warned.**_**

* * *

**Chapter 1**

All day Elizabeth had felt that something was wrong. At first, it was just a niggling sensation in the corners of her brain. She tried to ignore it and work her way through her book. She had a deadline coming up in less than two weeks and had so much left to write.

By 1 p.m. though, that little worry had reached full-scale panic mode. She felt it in her whole body - her skin was cold and clammy, her hands were shaking and her breaths were coming in rapid, short puffs. Inertia settled in. The sheer panic had rendered her completely immobile. Electric shocks of pain shot down her spine, so fierce, that lights were exploding in front of her eyes.

_Jessica,_ she thought in the fog of her brain. _Jessica. Something's wrong with Jessica.  
_  
The phone rang, breaking the preternatural quiet of the room. She dreaded answering. She didn't want to know. It took all of her might, all of her strength, to lurch for the phone and wrap her trembling fingers around the base of it. She yanked it forward, knocking several items off of her desk in the process, including her laptop (the screen immediately going black) and a basket of freshly sharpened pencils.

She managed to put it to her ear. "Jess? _Jess?"_ She said, her voice sounding high and breathless to her own ears. "Tell me you're okay. Tell me where you are and I'll - I'll come get you."

"Liz, it's Todd," a familiar, husky voice filled the line.

"What's wrong with Jessica?" Elizabeth snapped out. "Todd, tell me!"

She heard the edge in his voice, like he was trying to stay calm but just barely managing it. "Elizabeth, there's been an accident…"

Xoxoxo

"A surfing accident," Elizabeth was told when she gathered with Todd and several of their friends, including Lila and Ken, at Sweet Valley Hospital. She took one look at Lila and Ken in their damp clothing and sand-encrusted sandals and knew. She just knew. She lurched for Lila, grabbing the scrawny brunette around the neck before anyone could stop her.

"What happened? What did you do?" Elizabeth screeched. She hadn't cried yet but her voice was high and hysterical. "What the hell did you do?"

Lila screamed bloody murder, squawking about, arms flailing as she tried to free herself from Elizabeth's death grip. Elizabeth had never, ever been a violent person, but the situation called for it, in her frazzled mind. She couldn't stand to see Lila so calm - that typical haughty expression in her eyes - when everything else was falling apart. Todd, Ken, and inexplicably Winston - Winston who they hadn't seen in ages - were rushing to Lila's defense, yanking Lila free. Elizabeth still clutched vainly at her but Lila shrunk away.

"You're crazy, Liz, you're fucking crazy!" Lila spat, holding her neck where little red welts were already forming. "I ought to have you arrested for this."

"Go ahead," Elizabeth shrieked. "Why the hell is my sister lying in a hospital and you're walking around free and clear anyway?"

Lila glared at Elizabeth. "God, shut up." Her expression softened just a bit. "Ken and I left the water for awhile but Jessica wanted to stay. She wanted to catch that elusive big wave and she did, but -" Her voice dropped an octave. "It was too big; it dragged her under. The surfboard hit her, knocked her out. By the time Ken and me, and the lifeguards got to her -"

"No," Elizabeth said. "No! Jessica is an incredible swimmer. She would never go down this way."

"I think she was a little…" Ken looked around nervously. He stepped in front of his wife instinctively, protectively. "I think she was a little buzzed. We'd had some wine coolers and -"

"Nooo!" Elizabeth screamed. "No! You let her go out by herself when she was drunk?"

"She didn't seem all that drunk," Ken said. He shrugged. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He looked down at his feet and Elizabeth wanted to hit him so hard but Todd was grasping her by the arm, pulling her to an alcove under the stairs.

"Liz, it's not Lila's fault. It's not Ken's either."

"Then whose fault is it?" Elizabeth asked. Her blue-green eyes flashed dangerously. She saw the guilt in Todd's own orbs. "Yours? You - how?" She demanded.

"We had a fight this morning. Jessica accused me of ogling our new neighbor Christy and I denied it but it brought up a lot of old, angry feelings about how we had hurt each other in the past. We had a huge fight. I took Jake to daycare so he didn't have to hear all of the nastiness. But when I returned to the house, Jess was gone and she wouldn't answer any of my phone calls. You see, Liz, there is no one to blame here but me. I forced her out of the house. She wouldn't have been out there today if it wasn't for me. I did this to her."

Elizabeth wanted to tell Todd that he was wrong; that fights happened sometimes and it wasn't his fault that Jessica had gone off half-cocked on an impulsive trip to the beach. But in that moment, she couldn't see past her own anger and pain. She needed someone to blame and it had to be Todd. It had to be. He was the only option; the only one who was still standing close enough.

Before she could stop herself, she had reared back her fist and clobbered him with it. Hit him smack in the middle of the mouth. He hissed as the tender skin there ripped and split. Blood trickled down his chin and he dabbed at it. "Liz -" He started but she just turned and stalked away.

She went to the nurse's hub to inquire about her sister once again. They said Jessica was still in surgery, just as they had told her twenty minutes before. Elizabeth took to pacing and trying to reel in her emotions. She felt physical pain and a certainty that if Jessica … God forbid … didn't make it, nothing would ever be the same again.

Xoxoxo

The wait was interminable. When the doctor finally emerged from the OR, Elizabeth immediately looked for some cue on his handsome face that Jessica was going to be okay. Jessica had to be alright. Elizabeth didn't want to live in a world that her best friend, her twin, her other half, was not a part of. Despite all of the many problems they'd had in the past, Liz had never loved anyone and never would love anyone the way she did her sister.

"Is she okay? Is Jessica-" Elizabeth was breathing heavily as she ran for the doctor. His name tag read Greg Olsen with a bunch of initials tacked on after it.

"She's awake," Greg said. Elizabeth tried to breathe a sigh of relief but it wouldn't come. The look in Dr. Olsen's brown eyes said there was more to this story. "The truth is, she's not doing very well. Her spine is compromised. She can't move any part of her body below the neck."

"What?" Elizabeth cried. She felt her whole body sag and someone was reaching out to catch her. Todd, maybe. She wanted to fight him off, but she simply couldn't.

"But she's going to live right?" She heard Winston speak up. "She's may be paralyzed but-"

"Her injuries are many," Dr. Olsen said. He looked at the group assembled there. "I won't lie to all of you. I don't expect her to make it through the night, let alone the next few hours. If there's anything you want to tell her..."

Elizabeth was screaming inside. Screaming so loud that her head hurt. She wanted to drop to her knees and sob but she couldn't do it. Not with the arms holding her upright, not with Jessica needing her to be strong.

"Where are Mrs. Wilkins's parents?" Dr. Olsen asked. "They might want to be here when it happens."

_"__It"._ He meant Jessica dying. She really was going to die, wasn't she? No, no, Elizabeth wouldn't let her. She would will Jessica to live, the way she had every other time they were in some dangerous, impossible situation.

"I called Jess's parents," she heard Todd say from what sounded like far away. "But they're in the Mediterranean on a cruise and can't get home yet. They're really trying but-" His voice trailed off for a long moment. "Can we see her?"

Dr. Olsen nodded. "Yes. We're trying to keep her comfortable but it will probably comfort her a lot more if her loved ones were there."

Todd looked at Elizabeth. "You should go first."

Elizabeth wanted to go first, more than anything, but she knew that Jessica needed her husband, maybe even more than she needed Elizabeth, a thought that cut Elizabeth deeply.

"No, you go," Elizabeth said, her voice sounding hollow to her own ears. "Just tell her I'm out here, okay? Tell her I'm not giving up on her."

"Okay," Todd agreed. "Are you going to be alright?"

"I'm not the one who's lying in a hospital, paralyzed," Elizabeth spat, choking up, but still unable to cry.

Todd gently disentangled from her. He tried pushing her down into a chair but she wouldn't go for it. She just stubbornly shook her head. Todd sighed and hurried after Dr. Olsen. Elizabeth took to pacing madly again.

XoXoXo

Elizabeth's friends tried in vain to comfort her but she ended up telling them to just keep their distance. Still, she heard them sharing reminiscences off to the side about Jessica. As if Jessica was already gone. It made Elizabeth feel physically sick. Her gut was roiling.

It could have been five minutes or five hours when Todd finally reappeared. Elizabeth had lost all sense of time. She was barely holding on to reality. This was the very worst thing that had ever happened to her, _ever._

"Liz, she's asking for you," Todd said. She looked up at him to see his eyes were filled with unshed tears.

"She can talk. That's a good sign right?"

"She's trying her best but … Liz, it's not good," Todd said. His voice broke and he hurried away from Elizabeth, sequestering himself in a corner, punching a wall angrily.

Elizabeth squared her shoulders and forced herself to walk forward. She vaguely heard a nurse give her Jessica's room number and she weaved her way blindly down a long hallway until she sensed, rather than saw, Jessica. Their connection was still so strong, even now.

Elizabeth gingerly pushed open the door. She felt the tears come then, gushing down her face, as she saw all of the machines and lines Jessica was hooked up to. Jessica had a large bandage on her head and she was staring vacantly up at the ceiling as if counting the ceiling tiles.

Elizabeth cleared her throat, burying down a sob, and approached her sister slowly and carefully. "Hey, Jess," she said weakly. She reached for Jessica's hand instinctively. Jessica did not return the squeeze she gave her. Her fingers just hung limp in Elizabeth's grasp.

Jessica's eyes moved to Elizabeth's - eyes identical to Elizabeth's. The weakest smile ever crested her lips. "Y-you came," Jessica choked out.

"Of course I did. Where else would I be?" Elizabeth asked. A tear rolled down her cheek and she dashed at it quickly.

"Don't cry, Lizzie," Jessica said. "Please don't cry."

"I can't help it. Seeing you like this …. Oh, Jess, why did you have to run off to the beach today of all days?"

"You're scolding me … now?" Jessica said. She sounded almost bemused.

Elizabeth was immediately contrite. "God, I'm sorry. I am just … I am looking for a way to make sense of all of this." She reached out and feathered Jessica's soft blonde hair, so like her own, with her fingers.

"I guess there isn't a way to do that," Jessica said. "I messed up and now -" Tears filled her eyes. "Now Jake is going to grow up without me."

"Oh no he's not. You're going to be fine, Jessica, just fine," Elizabeth insisted. Her knees were wildly knocking together. "You're not going out this way. I won't let you."

"Liz …"

"You're going to be fine, Jessica. We'll call in specialists; we'll do whatever we have to do to get you back to your old self."

Jessica sighed. "Elizabeth… Just promise me something."

"No. I am not making you any promises right now. Because then you'll give up and you can't give up."

Jessica stubbornly pressed on, as if she hadn't heard Elizabeth. "You have to promise me you'll take care of Jake. That you'll tell him every day how much I love him."

"Jessica!" Elizabeth howled, fat teardrops rolling down her face. "Stop this."

"And Todd. You have to take care of him too. You know how he is - he'll act so strong and brave while inside, he'll be a mess. Be there for him okay? You're the only one who ever loved him as much as I do."

"Jessica, you're - Just stop. I can't hear this anymore." Elizabeth wanted to drop to her knees and sob forever but she couldn't let herself. Not now.

"Love Jake and Todd. Love them both and don't let them get away," Jessica said. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry for anything. Ever again."

"I am sorry for all the times I hurt you, stole your stuff, including your… boyfriends… Sorry for every time I ever made fun of your wardrobe or said that you were smart and bookish. I'm sorry-"

"Jess…"

"Let me finish, Liz."

Elizabeth nodded. "Okay…"

"And most of all, I'm sorry for checking out early. We were supposed to have a lot more years together, Lizzie. But know - please know that I love you."

"I love you too, Jess," Elizabeth said. More tears rolled down her face. One escaped Jessica's eye and then her eyelids fluttered closed. Elizabeth desperately reached for her twin sister. "Jessica? _Jessica!_ No. Hold on, okay." She looked desperately towards the doorway. "Help! Somebody help me! My sister! My sister - someone save her!"

Almost immediately Dr. Olsen and a team of fellow medics and nurses came crashing into the room. They shoved Elizabeth aside and she stood in the corner of the room, shaking violently, as she watched the monitor. The lines were slowing down on it, getting flatter and flatter, until she heard Dr. Olsen say that he had to "call it".

Elizabeth screamed and screamed. Strong arms were reaching for her again and she tumbled into them as she heard the words that would haunt her for the rest of her life...

_"__Time of death. 1830 hours."_

TO BE CONTINUED.


End file.
